Out With The Golden Rule, In With The Platinum Rule! (i.e., The Golden Rule Is Wrong, Part II)
Last week I explained why the Golden Rule is misguided, misplaced, and just plain wrong. Today I follow up by completing two examples on how to operate under the Platinum Rule: “Do Unto Others As They Would Like You To Do Unto Them.” I’m going to refer to the first article throughout this article so click on the link above for reference purposes.
Both examples involved two people with polar opposite Myers-Briggs personality types - ISTJ (Tom) and ENTP (Jerry). I was planning on giving everyone a primer on the differences between the types, but fortunately for us this fabulous article on the difference between introverts and extroverts kickstarted it for me.
Please read it and consider the people you know at work - who do you think is introverted and who is extroverted?
For reference, here is a nice brief overview of the other Myers-Briggs preferences. Again, consider the people you know at work - who is sensing and who is intuitive? Who is thinking and who is feeling? Who is judging and who is perceiving?
Now that you’ve had your free primer…let’s get back to Tom and Jerry. The key is to get them to understand their own type, and one another’s types. Refer to the aspects I described in the first article - I’ll address them one by one below.
Scenario 1: Co-Workers
Time management/Rules - Since Tom is a stickler for schedule and Jerry likes to be more free-form, they are bound to get on one another’s nerves. Meetings are pretty easy to deal with - schedule meetings etc. no more, and no less, than a week out. This compromise pushes both out of their comfort zones pretty equally. Deliverables, on the other hand, might be more of a problem. Since Jerry is motivated by the deadline, he won’t have his piece done when Tom has his done, or else Tom will be so far ahead of him that they won’t be able to effectively coordinate during the project. The key to this is to enact milestones. Milestones constitute a deadline, so Jerry will be motivated to get whatever is due completed on time. But since this pushes Jerry out of his type moreso than Tom, the key will be to enact as few milestones as possible.
Receiving information - They can get information in their preferred manners and neither should be affected by the other. But when it comes time to creating reports, briefings, etc., Tom and Jerry also have different preferences for GIVING information. The two of them need to understand that it is the AUDIENCE’S types, not THEIR types, that should determine how they show information. If their audience is primarily N-Ps they’ll want a big picture, abstract briefing. If the are briefing S-Js they’ll have to show lots of facts, charts and data. So one or the other will likely be pushed out of their comfort zone and will have to learn to show information in the other’s preferred style.
Decisions - Here is an area in which Tom and Jerry’s two styles complement one another. Let Tom handle the fact finding/logical end of the process in order to converge to a manageable number of good alternatives, then let Jerry flesh them out to determine how the alternatives impact people in the organization and their customers. The key to them working together is a mutual understanding of the importance of the other’s decision-making preference. Their recommendations should reflect an integration of thinking and feeling factors. Again, the type of their audience is key here - they will have to explain the importance of the logic behind the recommendations to the Fs, and the importance of the impact on people to the Ts.
Expressing themselves - Jerry is energized by meetings, while Tom basically sits and listens, then goes off by himself to ‘recharge’ and reflect on what he’s heard. Jerry will express himself in meetings, but Tom will express himself after recharging. Jerry might be frustrated if he has to wait for Tom but he shouldn’t. Jerry needs to let Tom express himself in his own way, even if it means they can’t take action on everything immediately after meetings. If Tom is leading the meeting, Jerry will have no problem expressing himself verbally. If Jerry is leading the meeting, he could help Tom ‘be heard’ by asking all meeting participants to write down thoughts in a hot wash up or 5-minute meeting wrap-up.
Creativity: “Improve the box,” says Tom. “Blow up the box,” says Jerry. It is in this area that the two will have the hardest time understanding one another. If the problem at hand calls for improving something, Jerry will still want to start from scratch. If the problem at hand calls for something novel, Tom won’t be able to provide effective ideas. But in the latter case each can have a definitive role. If the problem calls for novel solutions, Jerry is the more adept resource. He’ll be able to proliferate novel ideas easiest. Tom has to then play the role of ‘devil’s advocate’ and evaluate Jerry’s ideas, identifying negatives and suggesting ways to mitigate them. Tom can also be a valuable resource for determining what it will take to implement Jerry’s ideas.
Scenario 2: Tom Works For Jerry
In the previous scenario we were able to figure out ways that Tom and Jerry could cooperate and collaborate. Here, however, the relationship is a lot more lopsided - Tom the ISTJ works for Jerry the ENFP. If Jerry is a good manager he will realize that there are some things that Tom will be very good at as an ISTJ, and that some things will be well outside his comfort zone. Jerry will know that if he gives Tom a deadline, he’ll work toward it diligently from day one. Tom will have all the facts and details of any issue at his disposal if a decision needs to be made. If Jerry needs to get something done in a hurry, Tom will be his go-to man.
As long as Tom has a role in the organization that is well-suited to his personality type and creative style things will be fine - until Tom needs to work closely with Jerry. Jerry’s preference for receiving information is not within Tom’s preference for giving it. Jerry’s decision-making processes are people-based, Tom’s recommendations will be fact-and-logic-based.
Remembering that personality types are preferences, it’s not unreasonable to expect Tom to change how he acts in certain situations, in order to interface with Jerry more effectively. Tom will need to learn how to be more ‘big-picture’ in his presentation of information, and will need to constantly remind himself how important it is to Jerry that all recommendations take into account the impact on their people.
Conclusion
What I’ve given you is a simple yet powerful example of how people with different types and styles can use the Platinum Rule to work more effectively together. The more you learn about style, type, and temperament, the better you’ll be able to put the Platinum Rule to work for you.
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[...] I’ve given you two scenarios. I’d like for you to use the Platinum Rule and make suggestions (via the handy comment form below!) for how Tom can better relate to Jerry, and vice versa. I’ll follow up later this week with my thoughts. [...]
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[...] Out With The Golden Rule, In With The Platinum Rule! (i.e., The Golden Rule Is Wrong, Part II) Posted on October 8, 2007 by Innovation Catalyst Open Source Innovation has moved - here is the new link to Out With The Golden Rule, In With The Platinum Rule! [...]
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